I need to start this post by saying that I don't like the phrase "work/life balance. I think it's a little too vague and frankly, has been overdone and doesn't really mean anything anymore. I propose a new term: a balance of action and self-care.
I think we're in a very interesting time when it comes to lifestyle trends that are promoted through social media and popular culture. There has been a significant rise in productivity culture, the importance of self-care, hustle culture and the slow living movement.
And as much as these ideas are currently clashing; people think one can't exist if the other is around (as if it's very Harry and Voldemort), my opinion on this is a bit different because I think there is a way to balance these concepts into a happy medium for everyone to be satisfied. Right now I feel like they're such crazy extremes. I watch this vlogger worldofstan and he went on a rant about that. Like why are they such extremes? Either you're always working or you're always taking it slow. And it really doesn't have to be like that. Linking the video here if you want to take a peak (he's hilarious and his style is to die and he lives in Tokyo so it's really a win all around).
So the reason I'm bringing this up is that I've only just recently learned the balance of taking these extremes and creating a good environment for myself to be able to grow and blossom in. I'm a huge daydreamer. Like I loooove to just sit or go on a walk and listen to music and imagine things and what life will one day be like. And because of that I really got into manifestations and priming the brain with the reality that I want to live in. However, for the while, there was a disconnect because I wasn't really taking the action towards it.
Like I was taking some action but not strategically you know? I was doing things here and there and never really giving my all because I didn't know what to give my all to. I was basically a little lost. It's taken years honestly but in the past couple of months I've finally figured it out and it has been the most peaceful realisation. I mean seriously, I have less anxiety, I have more energy and I'm confident and sure about what I'm doing and what is to come because now I feel like the manifestations and dreams of the life I want to live will actually become reality because they are solidified in goals that I know I can attain through action.
Now let me say this. Rest is important. I love slow living. I'm a writer so my ultimate ideal life is to travel and write surrounded by beautiful architecture, nature and love. (Give me 20 years and I'll be there.) But at the same time, I think a certain amount of energy, action and push goes into life if you have goals and dreams that you want to attain and not settle for anything less, you have to put effort into it.
That doesn't mean sacrificing rest and self-care, but you may need to shift around priorities and how much time you spend doing what. It's really just about finding the balance.
A bit of hard truth time. Manifestations are useless if there's no action behind them. Read any self-help book that's regarding goals, career and finances and the bottom line of all of them is to take the action. Nothing will ever happen if you sit around waiting. If you're not convinced about how much waiting puts you back, read the play Waiting for Godot. I recently re-read it (it's short and a super easy read) and it made me realise all over again like I did in high school that I don't want to spend my life waiting. I want to achieve all the things I'm setting out to achieve. And to do that I have to take action.
How to balance action and rest
Make a list of your goals/manifestations/dreams — get super specific. I mean it. Get so specific you even know what colour the walls are in your dream home. Write it all out. Jen Sincero in You're A Badass calls it a manifesto. Write down all the things you wish to be, have and create.
Narrow it down to the one you want to work on right now — I don't believe in only being able to do one thing in your life. Life is long y'all and though you may need to figure out which one of your projects or goals you want to achieve first, doesn't mean that you'll never get to the rest of them. On the contrary, if you start on your first one now, you're that much closer to achieving what you want with it and then getting to another one.
Start now — the project you choose, don't spend a year planning how you're going to start it. Don't even spend a week. I'd say allow yourself one day to really draw out your plans and ideas and then wake up the next day.
List the small goals — To make starting now easier and less scary, break it down to smaller goals. The smaller, the better. Because having 100 small goals is so much easier to tackle and schedule than 1 massive goal you have no idea how to approach. Rome wasn't built in a day and your dream life won't be either but lay brick by brick and you'll have a Colosseum in no time.
Give yourself deadlines — when you're doing your own thing it's so easy to skip a day or put things aside but discipline and consistency are at the core of getting closer to your goals. Make solid deadlines and start building accountability in yourself.
Schedule in action and rest times — literally open your calendar app and start adding the events of when you're going to spend taking action (whether that's 2 days of 5 hours each or 5 days of 30 minutes each). That way once you have that in your calendar you'll be able to see when you have available time and in those times schedule your rest time. Get creative with this too! movies, nail salon, a long walk, picnic, spa, massage, float tank, an extra hour or two of sleep. Whatever self-care looks like to you, put it in the calendar.
By taking these small steps, you'll be that much closer to finding the balance that is right for you. Remember, this looks different for everyone. Someone could have time and energy to work 10 hour days and someone only has 30 minutes every other day to spare. Just like someone might only need 1 hour of self-care a week and someone else might need an hour a day. But living in extremes will burn you out on either end so the sooner you're able to find a balance, the better your physical, mental and spiritual self will be.
Do you have any tips or tricks on how to find the action/self-care balance? Share below <3
Until next time,
Stay present in the now and find your balance ~